Mindfully Yours!

I just returned back from a trip to God’s own country- this was my second trip to the clean and green state in the South of India. My first visit was nearly a decade ago to the southern part of Kerala consisting of picturesque backwaters and vast expanses of the Arabian Sea.    This time around, we made a trip to the Northern part that borders dense green expanse of a reserve forest. It was a great experience- different from the first one on many levels, yet similar on a very fundamental level, that of finding a sense of oneness with nature.

Let me explain the thought that crossed my mind as I sat staring at the vast green expanse, from my comfy vantage seat on the deck. My life had changed vastly since the time I made the last trip. D -uh- that’s called growing up. But it is more than just that. 

I think it is my own learning and journey towards achieving self confidence and a greater sense of self worth that has been the prominent theme this past decade.

Throwback December 2013- my first trip to the land that I have come to love. I was a seven year old who had seen her peers graduate from the Montessori and go on to primary school while I was struggling to meet the baseline expectation to graduate. It was certainly not because of an inability to read or to do basic math, but writing was a sensory nightmare and I had no means to express that.

The sway of the leaves to the tune of the breeze gave me a moment of déjà vu. I was finally able to put a name to the feeling that I had nursed for many years- I used to feel that I was not good enough. The lack of expression had completely gnawed at my self-confidence and self-worth.

Technology was my savior- the catalyst for massive change. You could say that I am somewhat famous today- well at least slightly. But this recognition brings with it a certain pressure to write well to make a connect with my readers in every single piece I write.

As I stared at the frenetic moves of the leaves, with a few stalks joining in the jamboree, I was reminded that forces of nature do not exist to satisfy anybody. I write because it gives me joy.

A great thought, you may say, but I do not objectively view my emotions like a non-stick pan brewing a creamy stew. I am like an iron wok which gets a layer of deep-fried curry coated on it.

I like to think that being aware of this is my first step in the long 

journey of becoming mindful, for the last decade has proven that 

nothing is impossible.


 


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